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【眼看写作30分】— 提分独立写作三招两术(二十六)

新航道
2020-10-16 15:55:11

今天,在这篇文章中我们会介绍到在托福写作中如何通过语句的微调,让写作的形式通过语言的风格变化,让话语更飘但是说理性更强。


If a university will spend money on dormitory to improve the life quality of students, which of the following do you think is the best way? 


-providing a quiet room for study;

-building a room for physical exercise;

-providing a place for entertainment (for example, a place to watch movies).



本文立场选择选项quiet room for study。


开头不是本文讨论重点,故此省略。


破题:三选一的题型其实是一个车轮比的过程:A/B/C三个选项间的较量。以本题为例,既然选择了A,接下来就是AB相比。



【body 1】


Study room is certainly more feasible than a room for sports or a room for entertainment. The reason is very simple. There must be a sport center for students to do physical exercise. As a matter of fact, any center in campus is versatile with gym, swimming pool or multi-functional courts equipped. If a student wants to sweat, this place is where desirable to go. 


中规中举一段足够了,下面进入showtime!


【body 1】


At this point, some may give counterexample that students who want quiet place for study could turn to library as alternative. They presume that public study places can satisfy the need. However, does a student need to exercise through the night? A student who is desperate to lose some weight can do the night run outside. Can a student who is eager to study go outside and read under the street lamp? Also, quietness is not prerequisite when a student do some physical training, and it is necessary but hard to realize for another student who tries to study when the roommates are engaged in sports like running or weigh lifting leading to noises in a nearby room.


居然可以这么用问句???

凭什么???



解惑传道


Ø 没有采用常规的陈述句,而是用了问句进行让步反驳?


对,在写作中反问句会比陈述句表达信息更肯定,更强调自己的观点。


Ø 不仅反问一次,还反问了第二次?


对,因为反问句没有限制。同时给文章增加了很多个人特色不流于常规。



说了这么多,其实就是文章阴阳怪气会让说理更深刻!!!


【body 2】


Likewise, the same issue may be pointed out in room for leisure activity like film watching. The key point I have to state is that the disagreement in building does not mean I encourage students to be off campus during the night. It is quite dangerous and unsafe and thus this would be solved through watching the TV series or films from laptops or private projectors in their rooms. Moreover, most halls designated for public leisure activity is another ideal place to go for watching. Doesn’t it sounds convenient? Isn’t it cozy in cold weather? Also,isn’t it nice that some other students learn or review homework in the room specialized for quiet study while they have fun without any extra disturbance even shouting or singing?  


Ø 这里的反问不仅是观点与语气的强化

Ø 同时融合进了一个非具体的例子来对比较的内容进行例证。

Ø 反问的方式套进例子有没有发现这篇文章瞬间突出了?



通过这篇文章,同学们应该能够体会都在托福写作中,写作不是只有单一的方式,表达观点也不是只能通过陈述句来进行,甚至举例都可以调用各种不同的方式。而这,才是写作能获得高分的秘笈。


本篇结尾不是讲解的重点,故此省略。


上一篇:2020年9月27日|托福独立写作真题解析

下一篇:托福综合写作高分写法要点详解

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